Next time you find yourself stressed about the action or inaction of another, try breathing a deep breath out and coming back to yourself.
Oftentimes when we are consumed by the things we cannot control, it means that we have neglected ourselves and our bodies for that moment. So gently, come back. When i experience this, I tell myself “it’s okay” “it’s just me”.
If you are loving, attentive, and honest with yourselves and those who deserve it, that is all you can do.
What happens after that is not up to you, so surrender and breathe.
I visited a small village (pop. 112) in the mountains of Mexico and believe there is so much we can learn from them. First, they are completely self sufficient growing, farming and trading goods, like their traditional mango jelly and beautiful homemade leathers. The whole community runs off a generator with lights out for the village at 8pm. They work and live as cohesive team and a nurturing community.
There are no traditional doctors or medicines up there, but the life expectancy is much greater. I met a man whose mom lived until 108 years old. They believe in sunshine, community, fresh air, and the natural healing power of plants.
I was introduced to so many incredible herbs and plants and taught how they are used to keep their community healthy. Lomboy is an incredible tree with anti bacterial/ anti-fungal properties 10x as strong as aloe. Damiana, a small shrub, is used to treat depression, headaches,etc and serves as a strong aphrodisiac.
I think there is so much we in America have to learn about the nature and people who surround us. How can we be more efficient? Waste less? Move as a team? What medicines are needed vs what lead to more harmful side effects and what can we learn about the shrubs, trees, and food native to our land? How can food heal us? How can we live in harmony with nature?
So i wanted to talk a little bit about what got me into natural healing and nutrition....
Since senior year of highschool i have had more than 8 oral surgeries and been on 15 rounds of antibiotics for chronic infection. The infection spread into my sinus and caused a growth that has blocked half of my sinus on the left side and the antibiotics killed the good bacteria in my belly and led to candida overgrowth (which meant itchy rashes all over my body) and acid reflux.
That and realizing I had celiac disease and chronic fatigue syndrome during college meant a lot of feeling yucky.
After being prescribed too many medicines to count that just led to more negative side effects, i decided to try to learn what food and herbs could do.
I want to share with you what I’ve learned in hopes that it could be helpful to you as well.
The healing power of food is so powerful!
I’ve been journaling about it and I think I have some sort of nostalgia for the present moment—
Like for this time in life where we all lived in one place
when you lay back on the grass and look at the stars on a nice night
and the air is just right on your skin
and it’s beautiful everywhere you look
and you know it’s all you could ask for—
you also know it won’t last forever
because nothing does,
so it’s kinda sad.
I am always so worried about the people i love dying without really getting to be happy first.
But, I think if life is just the moment that we’re in and--
if in this moment you’re happy, then maybe it’s enough?
I don’t know—
I just think maybe we don’t have to worry so much all the time.
Let pain visit, teach you, and then pass. Imagine floating on your back in the ocean. And the pain and the joy are waves. Each wave rocks you, some gently, some violently. Some filling your butt with sand and your hair with little pebbles. Others rocking you into serenity. Bliss. But no wave lasts forever.
The only constant in this life is change. And the sooner we accept that, the sooner we become free from suffering. Not pain, that will always come and go, but suffering- the suffering that comes from resistance- that is optional 🌘🌗🌖🌕🌔🌓🌒
I shaved my head at the beginning of quarantine. It was something i had wanted to do for a long time. I have never been especially passionate about my hair, I’ve always changed it— brown, blonde, black, bangs, no bangs, bangs again— ive tied it up when it’s long and felt much more comfortable in my skin when it’s short. I was not nervous about it looking bad— i knew it would grow back eventually. I was instead worried about how those i loved would feel— my grandpa, my brothers, my dad... honestly, mostly the males that surrounded me. I thought it might disappoint them or tarnish the way that they saw me. I wanted to uphold their vision of me as their “sweet granddaughter, daughter, sister”.
But the beginning of quarantine was a big turning point for me. So many things in my world - and the world in general- were changing. I was forced to let go of a lot of the external things i had come to associate with my identity and what was left was just me— to feel and breathe. it’s crazy that so much of our lives is dedicated to avoiding our feelings — all the distractions, computers, drugs, alcohol, rushing, etc.
But there we were in quarantine, forced to sit with ourselves. So i sat with myself, and i decided i wanted to start sitting with myself more often. With that decision, i decided i would try doing something I’ve always wanted to do: shave my head and embrace whatever came along with that decision.
I didn’t regret it. I felt empowered and beautiful and it had nothing to do with how i actually looked. I was being honest with myself and with those same people i was worried about disappointing and because of that, their reaction didn’t even matter.
i used to love to sit on this fire escape, even though it pissed off my neighbor Edna.
it was my little refuge in a busy city—
where i could watch people pass by and look down the crowded street into the quiet sky.
i would eat breakfast and dinner on the fire escape-
my sister would sit right next to me, inside at the proper table.
we’d talk through the open window—
about our days, about our meal.
she didn’t want to upset Edna. but i couldn’t help it-
This fire escape was my escape, my happy place.
after a little while,
and one late night lock out,
me and Edna bonded (sort of) and she didn’t mind me sitting up there anymore—
it could’ve been those chocolates i left at her door
either way, i miss this,
i miss the city,
i miss living in a peaceful apartment on a crowded street,
talking to my sis through a window,
and i even miss Edna 🗽